Frustrated...
I am going to make this quick, my hands are already numb.
Robbie and I saw Dr. King this morning and basically my cervix continues to ripen, just slowly. I am at a complete 4 cm and then some and nearly fully effaced. Jackson's head is very much in my pelvis and he is in a great position to be born. My due date is next Tuesday and just as I predicted, Dr. King talked with me about inducing.
I have been on the fence about induction since I've been educating myself about childbirth. Sometimes it is medically necessary, but more often than not it's not necessary and tends to lead to c-sections. The administration of Pitocin that causes women to start contractions often leads to intensely painful contractions which can occur back to back, giving little "rest time" between them - something women need in order to mentally and physically get through labor. Also, once they put you on the Pitocin drip you are restricted in movement because of continuous fetal heart monitoring, which is notoriously ineffective at accurately monitoring true fetal distress and again, often leads to c-sections. There's a mandatory food and liquid restriction placed upon you as well nearly 8 hours prior to arriving to the hospital for the start of the medication administration. Potentially, I could go without food and water for hours, be confined to a hospital bed or rocking chair, have extremely painful contractions without the relief of an epidural and because of "failure to progress" be sent to the OR for a c-section (I've done my homework almost to a fault, I know). It's a snowball effect that is so easy to detect in women who have not given their bodies adequate time to go naturally into labor.
Today, I signed up to be one of those women and I am so disappointed. I knew Dr. King would bring it up....I knew she would tell me, "Catie, he's only going to get bigger." I know she is concerned about his size and my size and my inability to have an epidural, I know she is trying to make this easier for me and Jackson in the long run.....but I am just praying he will decide to come on his own before Tuesday. I want so badly to be awake when I have him, to get to have the time with him right after he is born. I don't want to be confined to a hospital bed while in labor, I want the freedom to work with my body, not against it, to replenish it with water and help my hardworking muscles. I've always heard the saying, "knowledge is power," but right now I feel anything but powerful.
Robbie and I saw Dr. King this morning and basically my cervix continues to ripen, just slowly. I am at a complete 4 cm and then some and nearly fully effaced. Jackson's head is very much in my pelvis and he is in a great position to be born. My due date is next Tuesday and just as I predicted, Dr. King talked with me about inducing.
I have been on the fence about induction since I've been educating myself about childbirth. Sometimes it is medically necessary, but more often than not it's not necessary and tends to lead to c-sections. The administration of Pitocin that causes women to start contractions often leads to intensely painful contractions which can occur back to back, giving little "rest time" between them - something women need in order to mentally and physically get through labor. Also, once they put you on the Pitocin drip you are restricted in movement because of continuous fetal heart monitoring, which is notoriously ineffective at accurately monitoring true fetal distress and again, often leads to c-sections. There's a mandatory food and liquid restriction placed upon you as well nearly 8 hours prior to arriving to the hospital for the start of the medication administration. Potentially, I could go without food and water for hours, be confined to a hospital bed or rocking chair, have extremely painful contractions without the relief of an epidural and because of "failure to progress" be sent to the OR for a c-section (I've done my homework almost to a fault, I know). It's a snowball effect that is so easy to detect in women who have not given their bodies adequate time to go naturally into labor.
Today, I signed up to be one of those women and I am so disappointed. I knew Dr. King would bring it up....I knew she would tell me, "Catie, he's only going to get bigger." I know she is concerned about his size and my size and my inability to have an epidural, I know she is trying to make this easier for me and Jackson in the long run.....but I am just praying he will decide to come on his own before Tuesday. I want so badly to be awake when I have him, to get to have the time with him right after he is born. I don't want to be confined to a hospital bed while in labor, I want the freedom to work with my body, not against it, to replenish it with water and help my hardworking muscles. I've always heard the saying, "knowledge is power," but right now I feel anything but powerful.
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